where is my rom com au with strict and sad teacher!Anders and students Carver and Bethany trying to fix him up with their big brother Hawke to get them both to be happy
or even better, Carver and Bethany trying to fix Anders up with someone else but Hawke is always there for some reason (too look after his siblings okay and he has the car and they need a ride) and Anders and Hawke ends up together much to the twin’s chagrin
Their first candidate for this was obviously Mr. Fenris, the phys-ed teacher at their school and that ended horribly, who knew Mr. Fenris was so opinionated against magic, on hind sight it probably wasn’t the best idea to try to fix someone like that with someone who teaches Magical Theory 101, and it definitely wasn’t a good idea to get them locked in the gymnasium together, and maybe this is a lesson for another day, write that down, Bethany
[Mr. Anders can blow doors up with his hands]
The next candidate is Isabela, Garrett’s always single friend who has also baby sat the twins before when they were younger, and you know what it turns out she is also Anders’ ex? The world we live in is so small and Garrett and Isabela and Anders just ended up going bar crawling, Anders coming into Monday class hungover and even crankier than before, this has backfired spectacularly
[Can’t he just use healing on himself? Apparently it doesn’t work on hangovers]
The third candidate is Alistair, the guy who cleans their pool and Carver really isn’t sure about him but trust me Carver, he has abs, and Carver is like well alright so they call him to Anders’ house and it turns out Mr. Anders doesn’t even have a pool in his house, AListair is just like well I get a lot of prank calls and Anders is so sorry, I don’t understand who would do this
cut to the twin who are hanging out in Garret’s car with binoculars, this is not going well, and Garret is so disappointed that it’s not going well, is this what you guys been doing with your time?? HEY I HAVE ABS
The fourth date is with Cullen, their mother’s part time personal trainer and also a cop, the date is actually going really well, Garret, why are you here (well you guys needed a ride to this fancy restaurant they’re having a date in and I’m also getting kinda invested in this scheme), until Anders brings up the fact that he used to get into all kinds of trouble as a teenager esp given that he’s a mage
and Cullen is like shoving breadsticks into his purse like well thank you, but I gotta get out my dog has an emergency right now, and Anders is just really dejected, outside the restaurant WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME AM I SO UNLOVABLE
(it starts raining on cue and he doesn’t even have an umbrella)
and Garret just gets out of the car like OH HEY ANDERS, I TOTALLY DIDN’T KNOW YOU WERE HERE, what’s up do you want this donut that I most deinfitely just did not run across the street to buy, also my car is here, also my siblings who are also your students, there is nothing strange going on, if you want a ride i can totally do that for you
And Anders looks at him like Garret is the sweetest person ever
In the process, he learns a few things. First, the pup is most certainly a girl. Second, she’s a lovely golden color beneath the muck. Third, once she is clean and dry and fed and curled in front of the fire, snoring quietly, Vax can’t bring himself to leave her. Never let it be said Vex is the only twin with a soft spot for strays.
the working title for this was “vax adopts a dog” which is really all you need to know. vaxleth, 2.2K. title from “can’t help falling in love”
He finds the poor thing huddled under the eaves of the inn where he’s staying, comes back late in the dripping, seeping cold and only just notices the shifting shadows out of the corner of his eye. It’s a testament to the long hours he’s spent following his Lady’s mark that his first thought is to draw his dagger and slip towards the disturbance, silent as a wraith, until he gets close enough to make out––
Well, no dark being of undeath, anyways.
“Oh, you poor thing,” he murmurs, sheathing the dagger and paying no mind to how very much like Vex’ahlia he sounds as he crouches. “Oh, you poor poor thing. C’mere, I’m not gonna hurt you. C’mon, there’s a good boy.”
The pup shivers in the rain, caked with muck and whimpering pathetically. Vax waits patiently, hand outstretched as it slowly uncurls itself, damp nose stretching forward to bump against Vax’s hand.
“That’s a good boy,” he grins. “There you go. What d’you say we go inside, hmm?”
The pup whines as Vax carefully sets his hand beneath its midriff and lifts it up, cradling it against the damp leather of his armor (which is sure to stink to high heaven after this, but what’s new).
And so Vax and his newfound charge slip into the inn, and thunder cracks like gunfire and the pattering rain swells into the white noise of a steady downpour.
Imagine being such a selfish, evil, didgusting person that you would take yoirself off of a list that literally saves lives, including those of babies, children, and pregnant people, JUST so that after you fucking die your uterus will get buried with you instead of being used by a transgender person, (or a cis person who just happens not to have a functioning uterus.)
Anyway, who else plans to be an organ donor as soon as possible? I know I sure do!
I still think Moana deserved an Oscar for this part
To me, the moral of Moana is that only women can help other women heal from male violence.
The movie starts with the idea that the male god who wronged Te Fiti must be the one to heal her. This seems to make a certain sort of intuitive sense in that I think we all believe that if you do something wrong you should try to make it right. But how does he try to right it? Through more violence. Of course that failed.
It was only when another woman, Moana, saw past the “demon of earth and fire” that the traumatized Te Fiti had become (what a good metaphor for trauma, right?) and met her with love instead of violence that she was able to heal. Note that they do the forehead press before Moana restores the heart, while Te Fiti is still Te Kā. Moana doesn’t wait for her beautiful island goddess to appear in all her green splendor before greeting and treating her as someone deserving of love.
Moana is only able to restore the heart because Te Kā reveals her vulnerability and allows Moana to touch her there. Maui and his male violence could only ever have resulted in more ruin.
This is a touching anaylisis but it’s extremely racist as
not only have you completely ignored the whole point of Maui’s character, but
have managed to incriminate a man of color on a tumblr wide scale.
First of all, Maui’s character does not represent male
violence—it represent human greed. Maui did not take the heart because he is a
man, and Te-Fiti is a woman. He took it because the humans asked him to. The humans asked Maui to do everything for them,
not caring how greedy or selfish their requests were and in the end it was Maui
who suffered for it. Maui is supposed to show the flaw of humanity.
This has nothing to do with sexism, it has everything to do
with the fact that Maui gave and gave to the humans who could never stop being
greedy. Moana giving the heart back wasn’t supposed to be her “making up” for
the male violence that Maui represents. It was her making up for the greed she
and her people represent. It was touching however because yes it was an
important moment between two women, but you missed the point and you’ve come off
racist and very disrespectful to a culture at that.
Yes, Moana is an empowering movie for women, especially
women of color. But the last thing this is about is Maui being an abuser/rapist
or whatever. That is not the point of Maui’s character.
And to assume so is racist. You are a white woman completely
dehumanizing a man of color and ruining his image because of how you see him. And other white girls here
on tumblr have happily picked up that image and interpretation and rolled with
it. Maui’s character is now seen as an abuser or as someone who is violently
because of white girls here on tumblr—which it doesn’t surprise me. (an in a
historical context this is even MORE racist because white women would always
make Maui’s people out to be savages and abusers etc., simply because of the
color of their skin and their culture so yea, this is bad).
You can see the morality of the movie however you want, but
do not be disrespectful toward a character and in this case a culture.
@i-want-cheese Please don’t write this off as another “butthurt comment” or
“male guilt”, because this is really messed up. I see how you’re brushing off
some other people’s comments and I honestly hope that you don’t see mine the
same way because this is an issue I think you need to face/realize. You are
being racist and brushing it off isn’t going to change that.
the
@visibilityofcolor THANK YOU FOR THIS. As a Polynesian woman, reading that post and other replies painting Maui and even Tui as aggressive and violent men had me feeling some type of way, especially since White people have always regarded Polynesian men in such a manner.
I’ve thought about replying because I’m tired of seeing these kind of “Moana is a feminist movie” posts collect hundreds of notes despite the fact that these posts always conveniently fail to mention Pasifika people, but it always stressed me out, so thank you.
As an aside, Maui taking Te Fiti’s heart and Moana restoring it was symbolic of environmental preservation. Because the people who inspired Moana–Pasifika people, not just Polynesian–are always affected first when the environment is threatened. Our way of life is greatly influenced by the ocean and we believe that if you take care of the ocean, she will take care of you.
You’re very welcome.
This is insight for me as well (as I wasn’t aware that the movie also came fro the culture of the Pasifika people), and does give a very important perspective. I do agree with you, this movie is about environmental restoration, not some white fem bullshit.
I tried over and over again to explain to I-want-cheese about how she was being racist, but she responded by blocking me and other poc who called her out (even other polynesian people). People to this day are still trying to explain that she is being racist and culturally insensitive but she ignores us.
I’ve made a few posts about this, hoping that people realize how problematic it is to agree with i-want-cheese. Explaining to her racist white ass that this was problematic was like explaining to a bird. She wouldn’t listen and neither would have of her racist friends.
Sorry you’ve had to see this on your dash every so often, but I’m glad my portion of the post is starting to get around. (reblogged to the wrong blog at first lols)
Delicious Fish 