everyone says romantic comedies give unrealistic expectations of love but what about bioware games son i’m still expecting a random event to make me the only person who can save the world and assemble a rag-tag team of misfits in which one will be my adorkable love interest
Is it just me, or is a Dragon Age/Princess Bride crossover meant to be?
Zevran is of course Inigo Montoya. There is no doubting that sass.
Fezzik, I don’t know man, for straight off muscle I guess there’s Shale or Sten but they’re both pretty dang smart and Shale has a good sense of humor
Count Tyrone? Definitely Loghain. That ass.
Miracle Max? Flemeth much? I guess that makes the wife Morrigan (sorry Morri, you know I love you).
The Grandfather? Gotta be Varric.
That sick kid hearing the story? Obviously Hawke, who else would back sass Grandpa Varric like that?
And of course the hero of our story, I don’t know about y’all but Westley is definitely my Warden-Ellie Cousland. Do a little time as a pirate, generally be a bad-ass, hell yeah I have the will to stand, Queen Couscous has it covered.
That just leaves Buttercup/Alistair. Look at that. Totally useless without his warden, but can stand around looking pretty.
And I guess that makes Humperdink, Anora, because the Warden would definitely sweep in to save Princess Ali from her with the power of true love and badassery.
Okay, I cheated, and this reeeeeeeeeeeeally should have been more paragraphs than it actually was. I might have pushed at least one on top of another to keep to the three paragraph limit. I suck at this so bad, apologies?
(slight body horror! m!handers wingfic set in the same nebulous sort of ‘verse asthis ficlet)
Delicious Fish 